Ask us anything. No judgments.

Waiting for sex

Someone asked us:

Q. I told my boyfriend that I want to stop having sex because it doesn’t feel right doing it until I’m in love. He said that I may have a problem with sex because of how I was brought up (very conservative background). Why would he say that I have a problem? Is he right?

Deciding to stop having sex until you feel ready does NOT mean you have a problem.  Your values about when it’s okay for you to have sex are no less valid just because of your background. It sounds like your boyfriend has a different set of values about when he’s ready to have sex, which is okay, but it doesn’t make him right and you wrong. Don’t have sex because it’s something that your partner is pushing you into; do it because it’s the right decision for you, in line with your own personal feelings and values. Here are some helpful things to think about when deciding if you are ready for sex.

Nathan at PPFA

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    don’t fall for bs, pressuring, reverse psychology, psycho babble, Jedi Mind Trick, double talk —if
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    It’s complete bullshit that so many people...bullied into having sex, but then those same...
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Ready for a change?

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